It's been an 'interesting' week. Not for any real activity or project outside the house, but rather all because of Ubuntu and my thumb drive. I, in one of my moments of incredible genius, wiped the boot record of my mother's computer by trying to run Ubuntu from the CD in persistent mode. So I can't use that one anymore.

However... We did set up another computer, that I'm using at the moment in fact. Not a tower, but oh well. An old IBM computer, actually. You wouldn't think so, but it runs Ubuntu fairly well. I had trouble installing the operating system at first, but then I realized that the computer was trying to sleep in the middle of the installation, so I just kept jiggling the mouse every few minutes. Before that, though, I changed it to 'safe graphics' mode for the installation... I think it's good that I did that anyway, honestly. The computer only barely runs Ubuntu as it is. 256MB of ram...

Ironically, my only complaint is the monitor. The resolution won't go any better than 800x600...

P.S. I'm installing 105 updates at 4:30 in the morning. Darnit.

I'm posting from inside Ubuntu, today. I booted my dad's computer into it, though, because my mom's computer can't handle it well... I've downloaded TinyFugue a grand total of like twenty times now. G++ too, among other things. (Flash comes to mind)

I really like it so far, although TF seems to be losing output somehow. I need a thumb drive so I can save settings and programs and the like.


As I have told you, my two or three (tops) readers, I have in the past, and again more recently, received many shining compliments about my acting, singing, and piano playing abilities. They have all suggested I pursue a career in one or all of these, (if I'm interested (I am)) and take lessons to further my understanding if not of the mechanics, then of the theory.

But there is a problem with such compliments when it comes to me: I tend to start worrying that my success was a fluke, and I won't be able to live up to whatever standard has now been set for me. I start to judge myself a tad too critically. We are all our worst critics, I have heard, and I suppose that's true. We shall see.


I've been thinking a lot recently. Not about a specific subject, but I mean just thinking. Philosophy and death seem to come up a lot when I'm just thinking. They sort of go hand in hand, but I'll list them both anyway.

For example, I was wondering recently about neurological diseases and the like. Taking a blow to the head, or suffering a stroke or catching a neurological disease et al, sometimes changes the personality. And that, I suspect, is the next worst thing to death. I would hate to wake up one day and be a different person, and not even realize it. I could lose all of my friends, alienate my family, and they might not even know I had changed either.

I suspect it seems almost as dreadful as death because of my reason for fearing the latter: If there is no heaven, I will not exist... I can't stand the thought of simply not being. If my personality changed somehow, my old personality might not exist anymore... He would be gone.


I had a strange dream recently, but I forgot almost all of it... I was hanging on to something above the ground, deliberately having grabbed it and swung off a ledge or something of the sort. I know I was there on purpose, whatever the reason.

As my perch was swinging back toward the ledge, which wasn't too much closer to the ground, I was looking down at the tops of the trees and wondering what it would be like to fall... I was afraid I was going to fall, actually, regretting having clung to this thing in the first place. But I was also wondering. And that's about all I remember...